Saturday, September 29, 2012

The Dead Wiener is Making the Children Cry

This is a Carmen adventure.

Back in the days before children and husbands, when your co-workers were what provided the daily amount WTFery, Carmen worked at a Wienerschnitzel.

Carmen had a co-worker who we'll call Susan (as in "lazy Susan". It's the best I could come up with. Don't judge me).

Susan would show up late on a regular bases and ask for smoke breaks left and right.

Susan: (After showing up to her shift 25 min. late) Can I have a smoke break?

Carmen: You've been here literally 5 min.



This was seriously the only picture I
could find on google search. 
Susan: I really need a smoke break.

Carmen: Fine, if you need a smoke break that badly you can put on the Wienerschnitzel costume and go outside to promote business for 15 min. Then you can have your smoke break before you come in.

Carmen returned to her duties confident that an adult could handle dressing like a giant wiener and waving at random passerbys. So it was much to her surprise when she heard sirens and looked up to see three ambulances outside of the establishment.

The children coming inside were crying and many costumers were upset.

Carmen walked outside to discover Susan (still in costume) sitting in the back of an ambulance with tendrils of smoke still escaping the wiener mascot.

Carmen: What happened?

Paramedic: Well apparently she tried smoking while still in the costume. Since there was more smoke being produced than there was air getting into the suite, she asphyxiated and passed out. We got a call from some passerbys.

Carmen: Why are there three ambulances?

Paramedic: Well, we came to respond to the call. The other two heard there was a wiener down on third and had to come see it for themselves.

The Wisdom to be Passed on to Carmen's Children From This Experience: Kids, don't smoke and do stupid at the same time. 

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